Sunday, February 20, 2005


Strange the way the only thing I have to say about today was inspired by my dog. The new ways mean that things don't just happen. We have to make them happen because there's so many unneccessary restrictions involved the basic impulses and randomness of true life has been meticulously factored out of everyday existence.

This means things have to happen out of decisional contrariness instead of improvisational with-it-ness. Not neccessarily a bad thing for expressivity but a terrible thing for holistic enjoyment, which is what my sense of humour usually involves. Ah Well.

P.S. made a downpayment on the Celica. I already want it less.

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

fucking cunts.


yeah yeah. it was my own fault.
danny tobin is pretty cool. he has daughters. jeez. nice dope too.
The games industry continues to fascinate me far too much for comfort. What is it that I seem to require off these people? maybe a sense of belonging. this is something I seem to crave yet also push away recklessly. maybe the non-commital aspect of it explains my focused insanity.

Thursday, February 10, 2005


I rediscovered today that by the Jungian Myers-Briggs classification, I'm a INTJ. Fine. Still haven't bought the Celica. I applied for the Havok job. I want the Celica more.

I think I want to know a lot more about music, but I keep coming back to the reason that I followed the technical path in college, instead of pursuing art or music. There's no point!
I'll know more about music if I listen to it and play it more. There's no point reading about it. I was going to use this blog to talk about games, but I can't bring myself to do it. I wrote a fucking PhD thesis on them, so maybe it would just seem more like work than a diary.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005


OK, I don't know what this blog is going to be, or if anyone will ever actually read it, but since it's potentially available for the whole world to see, I'll just interject a post which doesn't actually say anything, but merely pacifies my own moral sense of propriety in one long meaningless sentence. Here goes.

I hold opinions (this in itself is to my own chagrin), that many others have held in the past. Things like; technology is a force for good as much as it is for evil, doing things for the sake of themselves is silly - sitting is inherently better than standing, lying down is inherently better than sitting, moshing is inherently better than standing or sitting or lying down, unless you're lying down on top of someone or vice versa. And many others.

These opinions are merely a series of bricks that I have apportioned to myself through the processes involved in being a conscious being on Earth, and can and should* be relegated to a pile in the background. Some people choose to build things with these bricks. The old wall, more complex architectural attempts, and so on. * I say 'should' because there is no particular goal for humanity. The goal is implicit. Why are we here? We are here in order to exist.

To take things too seriously is to negate the essence of the spirit. To not take this last sentence seriously is to turn your back on a source of power that could topple civilisations. More tomorrow. maybe.